"I want to come closer"

I miss the time I spent in Mashhad. I miss it a lot; I recall and cherish each and every moment! Like everyone who has been able to feel the fragrance, who knows what it means to be in the company of God’s beloved!

Although there were many beautiful moments during my time in Mashhad, but there was one moment that still makes my spirit fly! Whenever I am depressed, dejected or feeling sad due to the ups and downs of life I would close my eyes and recall that moment. A moment which has the power to detach me from everything else in this world!

Those who have been to ziyarat must know about the crowd around the holy shrine of Imam Reza (as) during the whole year! I heard about it a lot, many people told me that they have been fortunate enough to go there yet they were not able to touch the Zarih (burial chamber) of Imam Reza (as). This is very common! I experienced it myself, every time when i went to haram after reciting Ziyarat I tried to go near the Zarih, i tired each and every time, midnight, early morning, just before and after prayer time, just before and after sehri and iftari time (as we went in Ramadan) but I was not able to reach near and touch the Zarih!

We have been attending the classes arranged inside the holy shrine for the non-Iranian pilgrims, where scholars told us it does not matter if you are not able to touch the Zarih, your Ziyarat is completed and Maqbool (accepted) ! Although his words satisfied me to some extent yet I could not help but feel something is missing!

Only few days of our stay in Mashhad were left, and I was very desperate…

On the eve of Eid, I went to haram, as expected the crowd was bigger than usual, I tried to come near the Zarih slowly and gradually as far as I could reach easily, I knew I can’t go farther! Neither had I wanted to push anyone to reach the Zarih…!

I stand there helpless with a desire to touch it! Suddenly few words appear in my mind (Probably because of the lecture of scholar) “Zehra! Why do you want to touch the zarih? Your ziyarat is done! I don’t know how but I replied in utter desperation “Ya Imam Reza (as) I want to come closer to you!”

Don’t know who pushed me from behind so hard, but I found myself in the top row, yes! My hands were on the Zarih!

For the first few moments I could not utter anything! I was only crying…. Can’t remember how long I cried, but I felt that fluffy stick over my head which khadimas (servants of shrine) inside haram use to detach people from Zarih, maybe otherwise they’ll never leave!

She was saying “Harkat kunid khanam” “Move dear sister move!”

I lifted my head from Zarih, and looked her, she saw me weeping, i think she got some idea about my emotions so this time she did not say “Move” instead she asked “az-kuja-ammadi?” “From where have you come?”

I could not explain her, what spiritual journey I have traveled in the last few moments!

I kept standing there, honestly I can not recall did i ask some wishes at that moment or did I only cry! I did not want to leave the place, where I experienced the most peaceful moment of my life, until a thought appeared in my mind “O! Zehra, may be some other Zehra is waiting for her turn” and this thought urged me to leave!

This was definitely the best Eid of my life and such a memory which can turn my each day into an Eid day!

As I recall my precious moment, which gives me strange satisfaction every time but now it is not just the memory!

This moment at the shrine of Imam Reza (as) made me to find the resolution for the rest of my life!

These divine words which appeared in my mind at that moment are now my guide for the rest of my life! “I want to come closer”

Wherever you go whatever you do! Who steps out of your life, who steps in, what you lose, what you find! The sorrow disappears and the happiness becomes in-significant!

What matters is how much we strive to come closer to Ahlulbayt (as) ! And how far we succeed!

This closeness is so precious and powerful that it ultimately takes you to the creator of these kindest beings 

That is why Allah (swt) asked to find ways of reaching Him

يَا أَيُّهَا الَّذِينَ آمَنُوا اتَّقُوا اللَّهَ وَابْتَغُوا إِلَيْهِ الْوَسِيلَةَ وَجَاهِدُوا فِي سَبِيلِهِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُفْلِحُونَ

[Shakir 5:35] O you who believe! be careful of (your duty to) Allah and seek means of nearness to Him and strive hard in His way that you may be successful

When  Holy Prophet (PBUH) asked to love his Household in return of all the miseries and hardships he faced in delivering the message of Allah (swt), he was not asking for something rather he was enlightening us with the path which will keep us steadfast on the message of Allah (swt)

قُلْ لَا أَسْأَلُكُمْ عَلَيْهِ أَجْرًا إِلَّا الْمَوَدَّةَ فِي الْقُرْبَىٰ

[Shakir 42:23] I do not ask of you any reward for it but love for my near relatives

Love of God's beloveds has the ability to soften the hearts, to renew the hopes and to make you shine in the midst of atrocities!

as I thank my Lord for bestowing the greatest blessings upon us I also feel sorry for those who have been brainwashed that visiting the shrines of Holy Prophet (PBUH) and his holy household is shirk (polytheism) or biddah (innovation in religion)! I feel sorry for their biggest deprivation. 

I don’t know who else you can find except GOD in the company of his most humble and sincere servants!

What else you can utter except “Allah O-Akbar” after seeing the charisma of his most beautiful creation?

Where else Ahlulbayt (as) lead you except making you come closer to Al-mighty?

They have been the guides towards God during physical life, and continue to do so!

"O Allah send blessings on Ali bin Moosa who please Thee most, the chosen, Thy servant, the defender of Thy religion, rightly and justly established by Thee as an authority who made earnest presentation of arguments to promote Thy religion which is the religion of his truthful ancestors, blessings which no one is able to measure other than Thee.  

Peace be on you, O the representative of Allah!
Peace be on you, O the evident proof of Allah!
Peace be on you, O the light of Allah in the darkness of this (ignorant) world! 

My father and mother are at your disposal O my Mawlaa! I have come to visit you, adore you and take refuge with you from the excesses I indulged into, from the burden of sins I carry on my back, so, in the day of distress, be my advocate before Allah, because you enjoy special privileges in the presence of Allah, and He shows respect for you and brings honour to you."

Excerpts from Ziyarat of Imam Reza (as)